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Trapped
Every morning
I wake up
Into my nightmare
Stretching my arm out
YOU ARE NOT THERE
My heart screams
I want to break FREE
And follow you
25—6-2006
© Copyright 2006 Nahida Izzat -PoetryforPalestine – All Rights Reserved
Filed under: heart songs | Leave a comment »
When I said goodbye
Unlike yourself
You were cold
When I kissed you goodbye
Unlike yourself
You didn’t hold me close
You didn’t even kiss me back
Unlike yourself
When I cried
You didn’t try to comfort me
Unlike yourself
You didn’t follow me with your eyes
As I was leaving… moving away
Unlike yourself
You didn’t ask me to join you
On this trip
Unlike yourself
You didn’t hold on to me
You departed alone
Unlike yourself
You didn’t keep your promise this time
Weyyak weyyak yellyrbeit ana weyyak
En ishna ishna sawa, wen muttana weyyak*
My grief… infinite
My sorrow…deep
My pain… unbearable
For the world to endure
So it crumbled before my eyes
When I said goodbye
* From a Palestinian folklore song that khaled used to sing to me, it means:
With you for ever,
We grew up together, sweetheart,
If we live we live together,
And if we die we die together
6-2-2006
© Copyright 2006 Nahida Izzat – All Rights Reserved
Filed under: heart songs | 1 Comment »
Tell them
Sweetheart
Did you hear the rumours?
People are whispering, they say:
Our love is a myth… a fairy tale
It can’t be real
Too good to be true
Sweetheart
People are talking, they say:
Something surreal happened between those two
The fable of their love is legendary
Mighty death has failed to obliterate
Their everlasting union
Sweetheart
People are mumbling, they say:
Love cannot survive marital ties
Nor the test of time
Love dies when you sign the papers
And as you say “… I do”
Sweetheart
Tell them it’s not true
Sweetheart
Tell them
Hair may turn grey
But hearts never do
Sweetheart
Tell them
Indeed… our life might be over
But our love is yet a seed
That only just began… to bloom
27- 9- 2006
© Copyright 2006 Nahida Izzat -PoetryforPalestine – All Rights Reserved
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Permanent
How can I erase you from my book of memories?
When you’ve been engraved
On every page
Imprinted on every line
Carved along with every word
How can I delete you from my system?
When you’ve been saved
In every folder
Formatted by every font
Pasted with every pixel
How can I sift you from my body?
When you’ve settled in every limb
Cloned with every breath
Occupied every cell
Combined with every molecule
How can I separate you from me?
When you’ve been weaved
With every thread of my being
Plaited with every fibre
Laced with every strand
How can I?
04-06-2006
© Copyright 2006 Nahida Izzat -PoetryforPalestine – All Rights Reserved
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Joy and sorrow
With your departure
A black hole carved into my heart
A monstrous oblivion
Consumed my whole being
My whole universe
In a glance
From behind the laptop screen
Your gentle eyes gazed at me
The gates of my soul flung open
A surge of memories flooded in
Filling my core with euphoria
Wave upon wave
Can you hear the hypnotic tune?
Our tears … our laughter
Our silence … our chatter
Our footsteps speeding to get to the top of the mountain
Before the twilight
The folklore songs you chanted as we toured the country side
The twinkle in our eyes as we giggled gazing fondly at each other
The nights we curled by the fire
Roasting marshmallows and sweet corn
The days we chased the rainbow
Discovering pots of gold
Dormant … deep in our hearts
Bonded souls in separate realms
Chant together Psalms of wisdom:
The more sorrow carves into your heart
The more joy it can contain
The higher up you fly with joy
The lower down you descend in pain
27-09-2006
© Copyright 2006 Nahida Izzat -PoetryforPalestine – All Rights Reserved
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Is it really cruel?
People say
What happened to you
Is so cruel… so unfair
To have to lose khaled
In such an awful way
When you are so much in love
I say it is very painful
But not at all cruel
Death is nothing
But a gate way
Everything dies
Everyone dies
Why should I
Be the exception?
His journey ended before mine
That’s all
And soon I’ll follow
It’s only a matter of time
Before we are together again
We come to life
Only for a while
Also… the law goes
The higher you fly up
The greater is your fall
The law goes
The more intensely you enjoy your love
The more painful is your sorrow
This only fair
For some live and die
Without experiencing real love
And I’ve experienced all
It’s not cruel to give something back
And to feel more pain
Is not unfair
27-03-2006
© Copyright 2006 Nahida Izzat -PoetryforPalestine – All Rights Reserved
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All I want is
One moment of madness
Would you forget me?
If I disappear from your life
You asked me once
Teasing you
I replied
With this memory of mine
There are no guarantees
I don’t trust it with anything
You know
I might know people for years
But when we meet in the street
My mind goes blank
I know that I know them
But that’s as far as it goes
Now
All I want is
One moment
Of forgetfulness
One moment
Of insanity
One moment
In which
I am
Not
Thinking
Of you
04-06-2006
© Copyright 2006 Nahida Izzat -PoetryforPalestine – All Rights Reserved
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Pure love
Pure love is selfless
It demands nothing at all
Its greatest satisfaction
Is seeing the beloved
Full of joy and delight
Pure love speaks no language
But that of the soul… silence
It needs no words
For the beloved understands
Pure love does not require
Physical closeness
It transcends all barriers
Separation by time and space
Is merely an illusion
The beloved is always near by
Pure love is generous
It gives endlessly
Waiting for nothing in return
And the more it gives
The more it grows
Pure love is infinite
It has neither beginning nor end
Bigger than space, older than time
Pure love is eternal
Before its glory
Mighty death stands powerless, in awe
It’ can neither harm nor destroy
Pure love is beautiful
It shines through feelings
Like a diamond in a pile of coal
Pure love is precious
It’s makes life worth living
And you know what
I can feel your astounding pure love
Engulfing me
Can you feel mine?
13-03-2006
© Copyright 2006 Nahida Izzat -PoetryforPalestine – All Rights Reserved
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Touch of magic
Today
Everything was black and white…
Void of all colours,
My world was grey
You walk in
All blushes with blossom
Vibrant… fantastic hues
Today
My universe was 2D
I could only slide sideways
Just about left or right
You walk in
Up… I pop… I jump
In so many directions
My cosmos is of ten dimensions
Free… I fly
Today
I was blue icy cold
My shattered frosty pieces
Rattled inside
You walk in
My spring blooms
Jasmine… lilies…
Tulips and azaleas
Today
I was diminishing
Fraying… fading away
You walk in
My heart… consoled
My smile… radiant
My soul… whole
Restored
Today… all was dull
Shrouded with gloom
Clouded with despair
With a touch of magic
Of your being
Life is transformed
Exhilarating
Majestic
Supreme
15-05-2006
© Copyright 2006 Nahida Izzat -PoetryforPalestine – All Rights Reserved
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Hearts
Hearts are not machines, you know
That we switch -on and off- as we please
Hearts don’t abide by rules of reason
To them, logic makes no sense at all
When they love they don’t ask why
Without resistance they surrender
Even if burning with hurt and sorrow
They carry on loving despite the pain
When your heart is telling you some thing
Don’t suppress… just comply
Hearts know best, there is no doubt
Their awareness is Divine
17-02-2006
© Copyright 2006 Nahida Izzat -PoetryforPalestine – All Rights Reserved
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My life with autism
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