Benevolent Occupier Allows Clothes to Reach Victims

As a gesture of its peaceful
intentions, Israel yesterday announced to great fanfare that it would
allow shoes
and clothes into the besieged Gaza Strip for the first time in three
years. Israeli spokesmen said the import of the dangerous materials
was designed to ensure Gazans don’t fall too behind in the latest
fashion trends, and also to ostensibly clothe naked Palestinian males
who might pose
a serious danger to innocent Jewish girls.

Clothes, which are notorious for their anti-Semitism, have long been a
favorite weapon of Palestinian terrorist hell-bent on the destruction
of Israel. As Anti-Defamation League president Abraham Foxman put it,
“the proliferation of clothes amongst Palestinian refugees reminds us
all that times have not really changed much since 1939.” But the US
State Department nevertheless welcomed the news, with spokesman PJ
Crowley applauding Israel’s latest humanitarian move. “Israel has always
shown that it is willing to make concessions for peace,” he said. “The
Israeli government is aware that most of the homes it destroyed in Gaza
have not been rebuilt, so the clothes will give their residents a source
of warmth that broken walls and shattered windows just cannot do. The
US will proudly reimburse Israel for the costs of these clothes.”

However, Palestinians scoffed at the idea that Israel pays for
anything that enters Gaza, with local merchants demanding that the
Zionist entity release the hundreds of tons of goods they have paid for
and which have been held in Israeli ports for years.

The ten trucks that will carry the new garments to be shared amongst
Gaza’s 1.6 million people will also contain a far more nefarious weapon:
shoes. It is well known that throwing shoes is a sign of disrespect exclusive
to Arab culture.Once again Israel’s pangs for peace have driven it
to undertake such a bold sacrifice, risking the humiliation of its
occupying troops under a shower of footwear.

The hawks in Israel’s government have insisted that other, far more
dangerous materials remain banned from entering Gaza. As such, tampons,
books and children’s crayons, both of which pose a far deadlier risk to
Israel than Gaza’s homemade rockets, are still considered contraband.